AskBeehaw

No seriously, what does love mean to you? The love of your child, the love of your partner(s), monogamy, polyamory, (non) consensual non-monogamy, infatuation, limerence, heartbreak. The love of one's hobby, the love for an object, the love of an idea, et cetera. Whatever it is that comes to mind goes.

Photo credits: Gaelle Marcel on Unsplash.

I have some issues. I ignore most of them and cry when I want to. Is it healthy? Fuck no. But it keeps me going!

Today I’m soliciting feelings because I’m ultra disappointed that the person I thought wanted to shape their life to be with me, to match the shaping I’ve done to accomodate them, really only wants compromise when it’s mine! Super fun! We were looking at building a life and now I get to figure out how to do the big life goal things I want on my own! Super!

So, beehaw, what’s the most painful relationship thing you’ve been through? Bonus points if it totally upended your life plans. Extra bonus if they said they were “doing it for you”.

I have seen so many different approaches to ingress be responded to by Lemmings as inappropriate or creepy, much of it hypocritical to other responses, but I digress: is there ANY appropriate way that everyone can agree on for convincing humans to invite you past their threshold?

From the collective consciousness of Lemmy comments I have read, my impression is that the only appropriate thing is to be born into a coterie with thralls already and never make any moves or even so much as look at a human in your unlifetime.

I have seen so many different approaches to dating be responded to by Lemmings as inappropriate or creepy, much of it hypocritical to other responses, but I digress: is there ANY appropriate way that everyone can agree on for men to approach having a relationship with women?

From the collective consciousness of Lemmy comments I have read, my impression is that the only appropriate thing is to be born into a marriage and never make any moves or even so much as look at a woman in your lifetime.

I'm currently doing research to cover 50 years of history for a student union.

Most of the documentation comes from primary sources - minutes, photos, student newspapers. It's so many documents. 50 years is a long time it turns out.

I'm currently managing sources using Zotero and putting information down in Microsoft Word. I currently divide my sources by decade.

Do you have any tips from doing similar types of research?

What is the Fediverse analogue of blogs? Specifically, which facet of the Fediverse provides the features that blogging used to provide:

• long-form posts (without character limits)
• embedded images and other media
• perma-links and RSS / Atom feeds and other features so that content remains linkable into the future
• commenting and engagement and associated moderation features
• re-blogging and sharing
• community: blogs self-organising into interest areas, pollinate other blogs, link to each other, direct their readers towards each other, etc.

And, most importantly, the ability to create, grow and nurture a following or audience?

I'm on Mastodon and on Lemmy and, in my opinion, neither of those quite hit the mark.

• Masto is too close to bird-site: character limits (nearly always), shoddy threads, and the fact that one is invariably just firing toots into a torrential onslaught of public toots unless one actually already has a following. Hash-tags and other topic-related features seem ill used, throughout, so discoverability is pretty low unless you already have a platform. Engaging with others in replies earns a lot of boosts and favourites but zero followers no matter how well your reply-toots are received.

• Lemmy is too close to anotheR site. It's great for being a refuge from that and replacement for that but really not a blogging platform.

I'm happy with both of the above for what they do. I really like the discourse in Masto's reply threads, actually, but it seems useless for actually building a following for one's self. I'm rather new to Lemmy but I like what I'm finding, so far.

Imagine there is someone that cares about everything an equal amount.

Meaning that they care about every person, animal, plant, microbe, rock, etc. equally. They take all of their values at equal consideration (including their own).

How would they react to one thing harming/oppressing another (like a parasite harming its host or invasive species crowding out native species)?

How would they help one thing if they knew it would harm/oppress another thing?

Also let's say for the sake of argument they don't

• Sacrifice themselves to help something else out
• Kill themselves due to analysis paralysis

Seriously why? Discuss.online has horrible moderation and open-signups, and Lemm.ee isn't very much better. If lemmy.world and sh.itjust.works were completely nuked to avoid the moderation headache or risks from two large open servers, why aren't lemm.ee and discuss.online banned as well?

So, I have about 12 GB and I want to fill it with files that need archival.

My criteria are:

At risk of becoming lost

Being usable files without specific hardware (needing a software emulator is fine)

Willing to break my rules if I'm.given better ideas

My spouse and I have recently been talking more about starting a family. There's a good chance we'll stop preventing soon though we won't exactly be "trying" either.

I currently work as a software engineer at a fully-remote startup. Its a pretty small company without an official paternity leave policy, but I emailed HR and they indicated they had given other people 2 weeks of PTO for paternity leave. My question is; if you were in my position, would you consider looking elsewhere for companies that have more paternity leave? I'm not sure what amount is normal or good, but a previous search yielded dads talking about months of paternity leave being too short, which got me worried. Then again, since I am remote, maybe I am more worried about this than I need to be? My wife has chronic fatigue so I expect she will need plenty of help from me especially with a newborn.

I have worked for this company for about a year and feel neutral about staying. It is somewhat chaotic like any startup, but it also seems to have the best chance of success out of any of the startups that I have worked at. I could maybe find better pay elsewhere, but I am not interested in chasing money alone. Another concern I had was if I started looking and got a new job I wondered if there might be some delay before I was even eligible for parental leave, but again I have no idea if this is a realistic concern.

I'm pretty sure the real answer to the title is no amount of time is "enough", but hopefully you all can help me form realistic expectations. I'm excited and terrified at the idea of having kids and I also tend to agonize over decisions and over-preparation, so any and all advice is welcome. Thank you!

I have a few dvds with some missing their cases and was wondering if anyone has tried making their own. The problem with a lot of tutorials is you already buy a basic case to modify that already have the push buttons. From searching online I have found them refereed to as push hubs and spider hubs though there doesn't seem to be a consistent name for them.

I've noticed a rise in enamel pins over the past few years and enjoy them as a compact and durable piece of art.

Unfortunately, I don't know how to use the pins I have amassed over the years; hence my question of what you do with your pins.

For example people consider ps2 retro but I always considered retro being in the 80s and earlier. No right or wrong answers it was just something I was curious about.

I like a certain unremarkable car from the recent past. As they are repairable currently, can one just buy all of the parts new and put it together?

Are there any parts that aren't sold new?

Have you done this?
Are there any tools to help one get all of the parts?
Any communities?

This can also apply to peertube instances if you use that.

good idea/bad idea, necessary democratic reform or authoritarian imposition? are there better or worse ways to do it?

cross-posted from: https://lemmy.ml/post/19632821

Title

What else to say?

Sorry about the awkward title; I had a lot of trouble trying to word it.

Anyway, I got my first pair of glasses yesterday. I went in for my first eye exam in nearly a decade, and apparently I have mild astigmatism. So for the past day I've been getting used to the sensation of having glasses on (I never cared for sunglasses, personally; I've always found them hard to see in) and getting a touch of euphoria about how they conceal the brow somewhat. But then it kinda hit me that I don't really know anything about glasses, having not used them until age 36. I probably should have asked some questions about it when I picked them up, but I was kinda sick and didn't want to stick around there too long.

I know I could just google it, but google sucks now, plus, I may as well use the AskBeehaw platform, it's pretty quiet.

To be clear, I want to mention right away that I’m not a homophobe; I’m a filo-homo person. Gays shouldn’t be condemned. Everyone should be tolerant and love one another. Spread love…

»Don't you guys think that more and more diudes are starting to look like gays and generally tolerate homosexual behavior in themselves and experiment? Because I’m hearing more and more often that a man chose men over women, or that guys did something together while drunk... How much is this phenomenon increasing? «

Do you think a certain steady trend is continuing? More and more people are discussing topics related to homosexuality.

I’ll finish the rest of my argument in the comments, because a lot of time has been spent on pleasantries. Not everyone wants to read everything. »WARMING: This discussion is intended for emotionally mature individuals.

I love the idea of supporting small business and quality, handcrafted items. But Etsy seems to be more focused on drop shipping and it becomes a hassle to investigate every item I purchase to determine whether it ships from China or not.

Does anyone know of any alternatives with a good reputation?

Hi I was wondering what folk's here liked most in terms of neopronouns for first, second and third person.

If you don't know what that means:

• First are things like I/me

• Second are things like you and y'all

• Third are things like they, she and he

I haven't watched TV in years; kids and my previous job really killed that.

There's SO much out there since I last picked up a remote, and I have a fucking huge backlog.

I'm open to anything, as long as it's well done.

Series I liked: Vikings, Norsemen (hysterical), The Americans, GoT, Man in the High Castle, Expanse, Spartacus (Batiartus is amazing)

I'm scratching the surface of Boardwalk Empire, but open to other rabbit holes.

wrong answers ~~only~~ encouraged