Play Lego with the kids while she goes for a nap or walk.
this post was submitted on 02 Dec 2023
38 points (100.0% liked)
Asklemmy
1455 readers
58 users here now
A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions
Search asklemmy π
If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!
- Open-ended question
- Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
- Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
- Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
- An actual topic of discussion
Looking for support?
Looking for a community?
- Lemmyverse: community search
- sub.rehab: maps old subreddits to fediverse options, marks official as such
- !lemmy411@lemmy.ca: a community for finding communities
~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_A@discuss.tchncs.de~
founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
.
Maybe you could get her something she can enjoy with the kids, like a board game or something.
Food is love.
My vote is for hot soup.
Yes but cookies
If you found out she has gestational diabetes from anyone else but her, and that she's having a hard time, let it be. If she told you herself in an honest moment of comfort, tell her "I'm so sorry. That sucks." And let her vent. The last thing she wants is for anyone to make a big deal about it, solve her problems, or choose her diet.
Bring in donuts again. Seriously. She's an adult and can choose to eat them.
Bring in a more health conscious option. Once again, she can choose to eat it or not.
You're trying to find an option when most likely you shouldn't know about her personal health issues in the first place. Unless you have a very close relationship that you aren't letting us know about, you shouldn't be trying to figure out something to give her to make her feel better. She could very easily feel ostracized for her pregnancy in the first place. Employers arent super cool with pregnancies, let alone pregnancies that are in any magnitude more difficult.
What makes will make her feel better is a coworker that respects her space and private health matters. Don't treat her as special. Treat her as human.
.
Is she a tea-drinker? Maybe a bag of some really nice tea from a proper tea shop, herbal or otherwise. My experience is that tea drinkers really appreciate a nice artisan-style brew. It's an understated but thoughtful gesture.
Get her a book, maybe from the Diskworld series, its great for big and small.
.
Pet Semetary
/s obviously
Discworld is a solid suggestion, itβs very accessible!
Flowers. Or a little potted plant. But yeah cut flowers are the traditional gift.
A picture book for her kids, so she can read to them. Or a board game, to play with them.
Someone gave me a usb stick with a few kindle books on it one time, that was nice.
A flowery handkerchief or scarf is always a nice gift for a woman who has everything, I never dislike getting one. I have pretty handkerchiefs in my glasses case to clean them with. Better than scratching them with a tissue, and nice to look at too.
Someone gave me a usb stick with a few kindle books on it one time, that was nice.
A friend once made a "mixtape" on a USB stick. Instead of mixing music tracks it contained whole albums. The girl he gave it to exclaimed "A USB stick! How nice!"
So make sure to let them know that the contents are the gift.
It isn't difficult to label usb sticks. They have little loops to thread the chord of the label through and everything.
Maybe a new journal and pen? A coffee or tea? A gift card to treat herself?
.
Some people donβt want gifts like that, and Iβd say respect their wishes. It might make the situation worse otherwise.
Maybe just play it as βIβm running out for a coffee. Let me get you one too.β
.
I can't read the original text, so I'm mostly replying to your edit.
-
Doing something nice isn't an asshole move
-
Doing nothing isn't an asshole move
-
It's not a lose-lose scenario
-
You're not an asshole
-
This planet is better with you on it
Okay now that I've got the obvious stuff out of the way, DON'T LISTEN TO THE HATERS! The vast amount of replies were positive and encouraging. You obviously edited your post, which is a bit of an overreaction, but I get it. I'm sensitive too and I genuinely think it's a good thing (mostly when I see that quality in others π€·ββοΈ). Empathetic people like you literally improve the world, for everyone. But ignore the bitter people who do the opposite and want everyone else to be miserable too. Even if you had no impact, you should do good things because they are true and pure and worth it, no matter how the recipient responds and no matter how other people view it. They'll also make you feel good! Just keep being you...
.
A boy is throwing rocks into a lake. With each splash he worries that someone will tell him to stop. He starts with pebbles but after each toss and satisfying bloop, he feels a bit better and starts throwing larger and larger rocks.
As he picks up a large stone of 5lbs, he notices a family making their way to the beach. He drops the stone in a panic directly onto his foot and screeches in pain. The father of the family runs to the boys side. Without asking, he picks up the boy and carries him to a nearby boulder, sits him down and inspects the boys bleeding wound.
"What were you doing?" The father asked.
"I was seeing how far I could make it" replied the boy.
You're not the evil you think you are. It's late but I'll get back to you in the morning. PM me in the mean time.
Seconding the Lego suggestion. There's some really nice fairly cheap sets of flowers, succulents, and city postcards.
We buy people Lego flowers instead of real flowers these days. For something that dies super fast, flowers are too damned expensive.
Write a note to let that person know how valuable and wonderful a person that they are. Using specific examples is good. This isn't the time for vague platitudes. I would tie any gift in with how much they have done for others, and how deserving they are.
Stuffed toys, books for the kids and also spend some time with them and reassure her. Give confidence and strength that they can figure it out.
A candle
An 8 ball is always appreciated.
.
Does it have to be food-related?
.