Interesting points. I think you managed to articulate a POV I hadn't considered.
I think you make a good point regarding polarization. However, from my prior experience with extremists in particular, I cannot bring myself to give them the time of day. It is true that this amplifies polarization, but there is only so much time and energy I can spend dealing with such folks. Believe me, I have an ex-friend who was (probably still is) a neo-nazi, and the years I've kept them around felt like a waste of my time, and a drain on my spirit, despite attempts to be understanding.
I don't believe that it'll be a slippery slope in users calling for increasing amounts of instances to be defederated, either. It's not difficult to draw a line against extremists, and I think users can understand that.
At the end of the day I respect your viewpoint, but I may have to leave this instance if no action is taken because I simply do not have the mental energy to deal with extremist content, even if it's not an immediate problem. Thanks for engaging with my questions anyway, though!
Very helpful, thanks