Transmasc

You can act however you feel. If someone is telling you to be more masculine or feminine, they are an asshole. It's all a sexy spectrum and no one is under any obligation to act any certain way in terms of gender expression. Be your true self, the world will be better and more interesting for it.

"In this galaxy, there's a mathematical probability of three million earth-type planets...and in all the universe, three million million galaxies like this one. And in all of that, and perhaps more, only one of each of us."

Doctor Leonard McCoy

Everything that makes you you is a miracle. Don't suppress it.

as i understand it, being told to behave more like a man is a common experience of being a boy, so seems like you're doing it right to me

slightly depressing jokes aside, your identity isn't determined by how you dress yourself, it's determined by what you say and believe you are

that said, not everyone is able to discern the distinction. that doesn't mean they'll never understand... but it might require your own rock solid belief in what you are, and explaining the difference, for some people to understand it

it's a harder path, especially if you want people to understand you and see you how you are... it's easier to be gender conforming for a reason, you know? but you can take that information into account and act according to your preferences, balancing between your expression and your desire to conform. there's no wrong answer

for what it's worth, it's a reasonably common sentiment that i've heard amongst transmascs, to enjoy feminine expression a lot more post transition. usually reluctantly expressed due to a desire to pass

for myself, i was content to dress quite femininely for a long time. recently, i've started working out and putting on muscle, which i've enjoyed a lot... but it does make dressing in a pretty way very challenging. i got too big for over half of my wardrobe... sigh. i'll get back to it, one day

as a last note, phallo doesn't require HRT as a prerequisite, the way meta does. unless, of course, your doctor specifically requires it, which is fairly commonplace but unfortunate. i imagine that's the case for you, but i figured i'd include this note on the slim chance it wasn't

hope this all helps you on your journey