this post was submitted on 15 Jul 2023
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I kimd of am, why are so many relationships in media strsight? We need more lgbt representation

This is dumb and I'm probably getting offended for no reason but here's a small experience I dealt with recently

So like 30 minutes ago my grandmother wanted me to smile so she told me to think of a pretty girl and while I didn't react at all my first thought was literally "why not pretty boys" Its silly I know.

I'm not out but I literally couldn't be leaving anymore hints that I'm bi. Its funny how nobody noticed yet

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[–] EgoNo4 35 points 1 year ago (8 children)

I usually wouldn't get involved in this topic, but I'm half past drunk right now so here it goes: I've got nothing against lgbtqia+, you do you, freedom for everyone. But taking into account that the norm and majority is hetero.... I really don't understand what you expect.... It would be like me, a metal head, would ask why aren't there more extreme metal bands than pop bands?

[–] jennifilm 32 points 1 year ago

The issue isn’t that the majority of people are straight (though I’d point to what we saw in the rates of left handedness once we stopped punishing it), it’s how we talk about it and the assumptions we make - and it’s about the disparities LGBTQIA+ people can face because of the specifically heteronormative way society is set up.

Marriage equality is a great easy example - the reason marriage equality was (and is, in so many places) such a big deal wasn’t just so we could marry just like heterosexuals - it’s because there are so many rights afforded to married couples that aren’t afforded to others. Healthcare access is the big one - in so many places, only married spouses are considered ‘family’ and able to make decisions for their partner, or even visit them in hospital.

To use your analogy, it would be like there not being any metal concerts, ever, because everyone just likes pop, right? Why would anyone want to go to a metal gig?

[–] verbalbotanics 21 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Its different, it's that feeling when your music, which you know is absolutely fine, gets shat upon by christian conservatives who believe it's evil. But then throw in the cops and the government which historically and systemically shut down your opportunity to even play or listen to it and give more opportunities and legal benefits to those people who play pop.

And you're just trying to listen to the music you like, while every step of the way it gets way more difficult than it needs to be because it's systemically rigged for you not to be able to listen to it. It's exhausting.

edit: grammar

[–] hoyland 15 points 1 year ago

That doesn't mean it's not tiring.

But also, why does the norm need to be hetero vs "people are varied". Sure, most people are straight, but that doesn't mean it automatically has to be the default assumption, that's just a choice made by a... heteronormative society. Most of the time, we aren't in situations where we actually need to assume someone's sexual orientation, so we don't need to play the odds, as it were.

[–] Sekoia@lemmy.blahaj.zone 14 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Nah. It'd be like if everyone just assumes that you like pop, because most people do. It might be understandable, but people constantly assuming you like pop and only pop is... tiring and annoying.

Also, on a personal note, it definitely stopped me from figuring it out wayyy earlier than I could have. "Normal/average people are straight, I am normal, therefore I am straight" was effectively my reasoning.

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