Hey, so... there's a thing that's been bothering me for a long time. I've never been able to "fit in" at most jobs. I don't really have "a thing I'd enjoy working in" which, in my case, is a problem because I just can't give up more than a half of my time to something I don't care about, it really messes with my brain and I can't stay in that situation for long.

Programming caught my attention because it relies on stuff I'm quite good at. Solving problems, some creativity, more detailed work too. I have a few online courses done so I'm not totally clueless etc. I have an idea of how searching for a job looks now and other basics.

Now, for the main course: I'm trying so hard to find a field to stay in but for some reason it's weirdly difficult. I think it's because I'm not sure what this or that position really looks in day to day life. I was interested in C# and backend the most but I'm not sure anymore. Is it only working on web pages all day long? I can see it's usually commerce and I don't like that too much. I'm open to other languages too, that's not a problem.

On top of that everyone says "do a portfolio" and they're right because that's probably the only way to showcase the skills a person has but that's where things start to get tricky. My mind just refuses to do a project for the sake of doing it, straight up "nope" and it just doesn't want to cooperate. I tried to look into open source projects to help someone else but they're too advanced, I'm in that weird void between courses and real life applications. I tried to ask people in beginner groups if they'd like to make something together but no one answered, nobody I know needs an app for anything too so it's no use.

I think it's more neurodivergency related thing than strictly tech. Trouble with decision making, motivation, many people don't understand that.

My reasoning behind all this is that if I find a project that's needed by other people, I'd be able to complete it. I haven't found anyone with a similar issue yet though.

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[–] Krzak@vlemmy.net 1 points 1 year ago

My bad, ISTQB is the International Software Testing Qualifications Board, a software testing certification board, not a certificate. One of the certifications is Certified Tester Foundation Level. I'm reading about it now and it seems the syllabus got an update in May and there also are some older comments from around 2016 that the certificate matters little because it's too easy to pass, I'm not sure how about the new one. The test costs more than 50% of a monthly minimal wage so I'll definitely stay away from it.

It may seem like I'm too dead set on the portfolio thing but in here, the junior market is really tough (as it probably is the case anywhere else) so I think I really have to come with something that works. The number of offers is limited so I want to use these rare opportunities as best as possible so my reasoning here is that I have to make something, even though I'm better at solving real life problems than making up stuff.

On a more positive note, it seems that the worst of my low mood/burnout is over, I can dust one or two ideas I had put away and maybe, just maybe, I'll get some progress in the upcoming days. Assuming I won't get overwhelmed by all the information attacking me from all sides at once /hj