this post was submitted on 11 Dec 2023
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how's your week going, Beehaw (self.chat)
submitted 11 months ago by alyaza to c/chat
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just finished part one of my latest big project. not much to report; this has kept me very busy for the past week and change

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[–] noctisatrae 7 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

You're welcome to feel however you wish about relationships, but please don't assume how it works for you is how it works for everyone else.

Hey sorry but like chill, I just tried to suggest something, it’s not like I’m trying to force something unto you. I apologise if I was mean, just wanted to send some love ❤️

So: You don’t believe that you can be happy in a monogamous relationship but can’t seem to find satisfaction either in a polygamous relationship…. Must be hard, are you like… still missing her?

It’s cliché but… maybe try to sort out your feelings and have a talk with your partners.

EDIT: if you need recommendations of things to do to escape your mind for some time, can help you find games/books/hobbies.

[–] Gaywallet 6 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

I appreciate the sentiment and sending love. Sorry if I came off a bit bristly.

A few bits of clarification:

  • Polyamory is not polygamy, please use the right language.
  • I don't think it's fair to say I can't find satisfaction in poly relationships. There are many axes in which I am very satisfied with my relationships. It's just that all of my needs aren't being met, which is extremely common in monogamous relationships as well. I was mostly venting about that in my original comment.
  • I have regular conversations with all of my partners, they're well aware of how I feel and all very supportive.
  • I appreciate that you're attempting to help. I get the feeling, however, that you're not super well versed in what being poly entails or the misconceptions that mono folks often have (not to mention outright bigotry in some cases) about being poly.

I'm never opposed to recommendations. What books have captured your interest as of late?