this post was submitted on 11 Jun 2023
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Neurodivergence

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All things neurodivergent and relating to the broader neurodivergent community (and communities).

See also this community's sister subs Feminism, LGBTQ+, Disability, and POC


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Who here is parenting an ND child?

Has finding out their diagnosis also led to you or their other parent to a late diagnosis?

Any resources you'd like to share with the community?

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[–] Deestan 15 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (2 children)

Yeah, high-functioning ASD.

If I were to give advice, the first three tips would be:

-Trust what your child is telling you, over what common sense is telling you.

-Never hesitate with getting a skilled psychiatrist involved if there are any issues with school, medical issues, eating, etc. Because their standard playbook is usually insufficient and by the time they manage to dial in to your child enough to help, a long time may have passed.

-If someone tries to tell you how to "cure" the child, hit them in the face with a pickaxe.

[–] phillycodehound@lemmy.world 5 points 2 years ago

Amen. Encourage the kiddo to be open with how he's feeling and help them advocate for themselves.

[–] TechyDad 3 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Agree on the all points. Before our son's diagnosis, my son's principal told us that our child was just being defiant and we needed to punish him severely every time he acted up. I'm ashamed to admit that we actually tried this. In our defense, we didn't know what was going on and were getting desperate for answers. We stopped this quickly after it was obvious that this was doing more harm than good.

It turns out that taking a kid who is having an anxiety attack and punishing them for having an anxiety attack only makes the anxiety attack worse!

This same principal called my wife and I into his office to yell at us when we went over his head after he stonewalled us getting supports for our child (post-diagnosis). He definitely was the wrong person to listen to and we know SO much more now than we did then.

[–] Deestan 1 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Man, that sounds awful. And not entirely unfamiliar. Even when trying to be helpful and understanding, the school has the "they're just lazy and need more pushing" mindset that they can't get out of.

[–] TechyDad 1 points 2 years ago (1 children)

It actually got worse. We found out why the principal was so angry at us for going over his head. He wasn't in compliance with 504 plans and didn't want school officials intruding on "his school" to find out.

Oh, also he was having an affair with one of the teachers and sexually harassed many others. That principal "disappeared" one day (forced to resign) and my wife and I used the opening to get our son more supports.

[–] Deestan 1 points 2 years ago