Transfem
A community for transfeminine people and experiences.
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Some helpful links:
- The Gender Dysphoria Bible // In depth explanation of the different types of gender dysphoria.
- Trans Voice Help // A community here on blahaj.zone for voice training.
- LGBTQ+ Healthcare Directory // A directory of LGBTQ+ accepting Healthcare providers.
- Trans Resistance Network // A US-based mutual aid organization to help trans people facing state violence and legal discrimination.
- TLDEF's Trans Health Project // Advice about insurance claims for gender affirming healthcare and procedures.
- TransLifeLine's ID change Library // A comprehensive guide to changing your name on any US legal document.
- Gender Spectrum // Resources for youth, parents and family, educators, mental health professionals and faith leaders.
Support Hotlines:
- The Trevor Project // Web chat, phone call, and text message LGBTQ+ support hotline.
- TransLifeLine // A US/Canada LGBTQ+ phone support hotline service. The US line has Spanish support.
- LGBT Youthline.ca // A Canadian LGBT hotline support service with phone call and web chat support. (4pm - 9:30pm EST)
- 988lifeline // A US only Crisis hotline with phone call, text and web chat support. Dedicated staff for LGBTQIA+ youth 24/7 on phone service, 3pm to 2am EST for text and web chat.
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It's worth it to drive to a good thrift store. You can go a long way with occasional trips to some good thrift stores and some cheap local staples. Also, with the death of changing rooms, most thrift stores take returns for like a week. Keep the tags on and try things on in the comfort of your home. You'll get the hang of what fits you how in time. And don't doubt that you could one day have hips. I'm 34, on hrt for about a year, and just had to give most of my old shorts to Goodwill and buy new ones with different cuts because my hips and waist and ass have all become shapely. I got some fuckin cute shorts from the same Goodwill. I hope some slender hipped girl enjoys my old stuff.
Ah, maybe I need to loose weight to see them than, I currently weight 200 lbs
No you don't. Friend, there are plus-sized cis women. Weight is not gender. Height is not gender.
I'm struggling, too, to find my style. My mom flat out said she won't help me clothes shop. She keeps saying things about how I'm an adult and I should put my big girl panties on and I don't need the support of my mother.
Sorry, inserted my own drama. But my point is, try. I got frustrated a few weeks ago cuz I went to goodwill and they have taken out their dressing rooms. There are other thrift stores tho. And if you are afraid of being recognized in your home town cuz you aren't out publicly yet, go to a thrift store out of your town. Might be good anyways. It could help you be less self-conscious knowing you won't have a possibility of seeing these people ever again.
I do have a question regarding this, if I fail to loose weight would HRT not be able to give me hips due to male fat distribution? also sorry I don't mean to sound super depressive, I know it angers you.
Sky, it doesn't anger me. I have genuine concern for you. I, myself have major depressive disorder, as do all three of my kids. My oldest is battling an addiction with cutting. Your depression touches me deeply, and I want to help you and I don't know how.
Honestly, there are many more people much more knowledgeable than me, in this community. But, with what knowledge I do have, it should redistribute some fatty tissue, I think, regardless of weather or not you lose weight. It may take longer than you expect, or the changes may have been happening and you haven't noticed.
I would almost recommend maybe recording your own timeline, but with your body image issues it may be difficult for you.
I deeply apologize for coming off as angry.
Thank you for your concern, I know ive struggled a ton, I have been working behind the scenes trying to surond myself with real life friends who support me. It is taking time but hopefully all works out well. I do struggle and I get that, its just hard sometimes expressly when I'm having a worse day.
My issue is I was larger pre transition, and I havent really gone down since than, I also really dislike my double chin. It kinda hurts me when I look at photos. It looks masc.
I'm sure you saw my pic the other day. My biology isn't doing me any favors either. And so what if you were larger pre-transition? As I said before, if you are serious about losing weight, start tracking your calories, and start going for walks. Cut out sodas and other sugary drinks and foods. Sugars are the enemy.
I put my baby pic away. I don't keep any of my pics pre-coming-out out where I can see. Don't look at photos. Why are you looking at them? Stop it. Stop punishing yourself. You know you hate looking at them. So, don't.
My issues is these are current photos? Ive told friends to not take photos of me and I do feel a little sad and it hurts me. Its been hard to walk in my area (no sidewalks) (assumption of criminal activity if walking) and it's hard to have a decent diet. I dont even really know what I should buy and every time I ask online o get vauge information overload and rude comments.
Keto worked for me for a while. It's a high fat, mid protein, low carb diet.
You want to keep carbohydrate intake super low. Basically, your veg intake will mostly be green leafy veggies. Fruit, for the most part, is a no-go. Fruit is super high in sugar.
No bread, no pasta.
Allllllll the meat you want. Burgers, wapped in lettuce. Meat based (vs bean based) chili.
There are many, many keto recipes out there. But again, all diets boil down to minding your calorie intake. It may help you to download a calorie tracking app.
Do you have a local park you could walk at? Bicycling? Pushups and situps at home? There's ways, friend. I sincerely wish you luck.
I have been trying one meal a day, but I have had little success with it cause I just get really sick and don't do anything all day. in theory I could be loosing weight but I would be unlikely to notice anything for years, but I guess that goes for any diet.
Then you aren't taking care of your body well. Your body still needs energy, and if you don't have enough energy to move, you won't be losing weight. You will be too tired to exercise, and won't burn any calories.
Your body is trying to conserve energy cuz you arent taking care of it well. Three small meals will treat you so much better than the one. It sounds counterintuitive, I know, but if you don't feel well enough to do anything, you won't.
Edit: could also be why your mental health has been in the shitter. If you aren't eating well, it really messes with you, mind and body. Eating so little will make you sick, foggy, and have no energy to do anything
I mean the meals are decently sized and I dont always do it, but I do try too but I'm mostly unsuccessful
Well, I gave you my advice. If you use it or don't, that's up to you. Good luck, Godspeed.