dennis5wheel

joined 5 months ago
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for those of you with good communication skills, what do I tell my manager so she stops telling me I need to talk more (socially)? (programming.dev)
 

very similar question to my last one but this time with management, not a coworker.

Similar because she keeps pestering me with what to her seems to be an important issue. She doesn't seem to understand that I'm there to work and not to socialize. On our last conversation she told me we're a big family and that I'm welcomed to be sincere with her with a big smile, to me a fake one.

So many red flags I wanted to run, but I still have to articulate it in office speak so she stops pestering me.

Context is an exit interview management is going to use to try and convince me to stay, but I don't want to work there anymore, too much drama and cattiness over dumb crap.

dear introverts, what can I answer to a needy and clingy coworker who believes not talking means something's wrong (with me), so he leaves me alone? in c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml
[–] dennis5wheel@programming.dev 1 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

You didn’t tell us when he asks if everything is OK. That is a large omission, and I hope you can update the original post with examples of what led up to the question being asked.

I'm a nurse and where I work at we all have to eat together, meaning I'm a captive audience and have to be there, like it or not. My coworkers are so special if I eat alone, away from them, they'll come to me later and ask if everything's all right. If I eat my lunch together with them but read a book, they invariably ask if everything's all right.

I cannot win here. They need this level of attention and I just want to be left alone.

dear introverts, what can I answer to a needy and clingy coworker who believes not talking means something's wrong (with me), so he leaves me alone? in c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml
[–] dennis5wheel@programming.dev 1 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

“When you ask me if everything’s ok, it makes me feel pressured/put on the spot.”

have you ever done this yourself? To me it makes me look weak, giving them something they can use to attack me.

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dear introverts, what can I answer to a needy and clingy coworker who believes not talking means something's wrong (with me), so he leaves me alone? (programming.dev)
submitted 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) by dennis5wheel@programming.dev to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml
20 comments fedilink
 

I go to work to work because I need a paycheck, not to make friends.

Where I am there is a new coworker that to me acts needy (think of Slow Horses's Struan Loy), tries befriending me, but he invariably asks if everything's ok. I don't care about this person's life.

The first 2 times I didn't think anything of it, but he asks that every day and it's becoming tiring.

I feel mobbed and stalked, mobbed because he keeps insinuating there is something wrong with me just because I don't ask him about his private life and do my job, and stalked, because he is so fixated on me.

going to HR over this seems ridiculous, but I'm starting to hate his voice.

can you help me name this falsetto pop/rock song? in c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml
[–] dennis5wheel@programming.dev 1 points 2 weeks ago

you are right. thanks!

can you help me name this falsetto pop/rock song? in c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml
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can you help me name this falsetto pop/rock song? (programming.dev)
submitted 3 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) by dennis5wheel@programming.dev to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml
8 comments fedilink
 

chorus keeps repeating "dubia, ooh dubia" (something I didn't get here) "dubia ooh dubia, that's what I'm talking abouuuut'

if not dubia, maybe nubia or nuria or buria, seems to be an American singer.

it's not the bee gees and I believe is from the 80's. Melody is: d c c, e d c d c c, f f e f e f e d d, d c c, e d c d c c, f f e f e f g, a a g a g f g, f f e d e f g...

singer sounds a bit like Eddie Holman (hey there lonely girl)

ETA: solved, Robin Gibb‘s song Juliet