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Go to the nearest jewelry store and buy everything in it. Wait an hour, return it as per the refund policy. If there is no refund policy then I would sell it off. Even if I lost 50% on the sell back, that's still half a mil in cash.
Most popular jewelers have at least a 30 day refund policy.
This has been my go to answer if the hair stylist asked what I'd do. I'd go to different jewlery stores, because they'd still call the cops if you wanna buy stuff for a million.
(I forgot to add the "no returning items" rule; but since you added the "selling it off" part I think it's fine, hehe)
I would buy four tickets on a mini-sub tour of the Titanic and give them to 4 billionaires.
1 million in index funds which I will reinvest later.
The post specified cash. How would you purchase $1m in index funds with cash in an hour?
Bring it to my bank, deposit, then purchase online.
Though I'd leave it in my index fund, on average they perform better than actively managed accounts
I think getting to a bank, explaining where 1M in cash came from, getting them to accept the deposit, getting them to count it, then spending it in less than an hour is not feasible.
Because, depositing it in a bank is not enough.
It has to be spent.
So, if you don't spend it then the bank is left without however much disappears... If that makes sense.
And, given that, I don't think investing is a suitable application.
Otherwise, just invest it directly at the bank.
Maybe you don't get inflation-beating interest (ie, if it was your 1M you would be losing money), but after whatever-term you get 1M of clean money to spend.
Where do you go that accepts 1M in cash without calling the cops? And who manages to count that much money? And who won't call the cops if the money suddenly vanishes?
First I would bang on a neighbor's door and pay them to follow me with a camera then run into the fairly nearby motorbike shop and yell 'quick I'm doing a Mr Beast challenge I need to spend a million dollars in the next half hour!' all four guys working would jump at it especially if I said 'give yourself 10% commission on each one'
The only other shop near that isn't just groceries is a wedding dress shop so I guess while they're getting the paperwork ready I'd run in and buy their most expensive white gowns so that we could ride in style - though the train might get caught in the chain...
Oh and I'd run into the pub and tell them to ring up as much as possible before the time runs out so we can all go there after to relax.
2 chicks at the same time
I read that as chickens and thought your grand plan was to start a farm, LMAO.
I'm on a flight 35,000 feet above the Gobi Desert. The cash is pretty much useless to me. In fact it's a bit bulky and I'll be glad to see the back of it.
Plus, nothing on this flight can be bought for any kind of dollars.
I'd buy at least 10 snickers and a bottle of wine or something, right?
What could a banana cost, Michael? $10?
It's kinda late here in Europe, but I would immediately go to my neighbour and explain the situation quickly.
His house isn't worth a million dollars but I would buy it for 1 million dollars anyway, after the sale is done, I'd sell it back to him for a price so after taxes we would each get half. We know each other well enough to trust that we won't screw the other...
A monkey. I've always wanted a monkey.
Hey this guy's cheating.
Buy a bunch of prepaid debit cards and use it to buy a bunch of random bullshit from ebay and Amazon. Won't be able to get anywhere near $1M worth of prepaid cards but whatever. When all the pointless shit shows up in my doorstep, resell for like 75% of its original value.
I would immediately pay off all of my debts in my online banking/credit cards/student loan/utility accounts, send my Landlord my rent early via Zelle, login to my parent's mortgage and credit card accounts and pay them all off, pay off all of my wife's student loans and credit cards and business loans via her online accounts, and spend the rest on ebay gift cards.
It's cash though, how do you pay all those things off with cash in only 1 hour? If you walk into a bank with 1 million cash and ask to deposit it, that might set off some red flags.
It's definitely gonna set off red flags when the cash disappears an hour later.
Damn. I read "cash" as "liquid assets." and not necessarily, like, physical benjamins.
I guess I'd hustle over to the midtown and buy every single Rolex and Omega I could get my hands on at Watches of Switzerland, Bucherer, and Wempe. Probably would hit the half-million mark real fast and would then re-sell them at leisure
Quito Ecuador at 8:30pm on a Sunday night. Nothing other than small cornerstores and liquor shops are open. So I guess I'll buy as much liquor as I can to resell later.
Depending on timing, as long as there's a bank branch near me when this deal starts (which, there is one ~10 minutes drive from me); I would head there first, 100%. I'd pay off every debt I have with the bank, Credit Cards, lines of credit, etc. Should take 20 minutes or so, it's not a large number of debts, but it's not a trivial amount.
I'd then drive across the city to the bank that holds my mortgage, and give them whatever is left.... either as pre-payment towards my mortgage, or simply to buy out the mortgage and pay it off.
I wouldn't have much left after that; but I'm hoping I can get all that done in an hour. If, at that point, I have enough time remaining to buy anything, I'd probably see if I could hit up the nearest hardware store and buy all the power tool batteries I can find. Just the batteries, because damn that shit is expensive.
Transport in my area is so shit it would take me an hour just to get to a place I could spend cash; I would buy nothing.
Except maybe a therapist out of my own pocket to deal with something dangling financial stability in front of me.
Why do these always exist before the internet? We can order bullion online now. It's almost midnight in a fairly rural area
But yeah, I know a guy that will sell certain things for cash that normally require legal hurdles. But if you show up, cash in hand, he'll backdate things on his end. One phone call, I could buy out his stock in fifteen minutes because I'm a regular customer he trusts. He's usually got a few hundred thousand of goods in place.
Barring that, I'm kinda screwed at this time of night.
I know a couple of farmers that would let me buy livestock in cash like this, but that's only going to be a few thousand bucks.
I know a weed dealer that would be able to give me a few pounds if he's got it in, but I would have to call and ask how much he has.
Do services count? If so, I've got an idea for a cheat lol. Hire my wife for a back rub.
So, I just took a second and sent a text to an acquaintance and explained the scenario. Turns out you can buy a car in an hour or less. It's just a matter of paperwork to make the sale official. So, if you know a car dealer, and they have enough on their lot, you could easily get rid of most of that million in time. Most of the time wasted isn't really necessary. If the dealer and the buyer are already on the same page with the price, you could get as many cars as you have time to sign for.
Everything is closed.
Plan A: I could try to stuff an atm full of cash, but I'd be investigated for fraud, counterfitting or something. I would record myself holding the cash, wave it in front of all the security cameras I could to show that I legitimately have it, then insert it as much into the ATM as I could and acquire reciepts. In $100 bills I can put 50 at a time so $5000.If it stops accepting any money, I could try a crypto ATM too. Countersue the bank for stealing my money if they claim I'm responsible for the disappearance.
Plan B: I can reach the airport in under a half hour, I could convert it to USD as much they let me before leaving. They might accept 10k that way.
The trouble is, I will be asked about the origin of the money, "It just appeared in front of me/A genie gave it to me/I dug it out of the ground" are reasons that might not hold up well in court.
E: Wait does "spent" money vanish or does it stay?
Well i am not going to respond to this post until I am in the bank....Ahh crap.
Well Sunday afternoon.... Ummm
I would probably look for a local gold/ prescious metals shop. But i don't know if they have that much on hand.
An alternative would be Costco. I should be able to get there in 15 minutes and then maybe that is enough time for me to explain the situation and give me a bar code scanner and access to that locked room with all of the expenses stuff is. And I will just start scanning like mad.
Along the way to Costco i can call family and friends and they can meet me there to help coordinate.
After that it is just a matter of reselling everything. Or i guess it is Costco i could just return it all. Although that doesn't feel right lol.
I'll just call everyone to distribute the money to. Spread the information about. When the money disappears people think I'm a magician
Industry town, 1pm
I'd buy a $1M hug from someone I'm very close to. Then offer them a $500K hug.
It doesn't break rule 3 as written.
Gold
Crypto, shouldn't make a such a big wave compared to receiving 1M on am anonymous source and quickly buying stock exchange with it
I'm in Vegas, 22:22, so.. $1 million dollars of food, water, and sun screen for the un housed.
I would "buy" an agreement with my parents that from then on they will purchase for me whatever i ask them toβup to a total of a million dollars.
Cheap Answer: Go to my nearest Walmart/Grocery Store (10 minutes away from me)and max out all of the vanilla visa debit cards with the $1 million but after fees it wonβt be $1 million but I would still spend the million.
Actual Answer: Luckily Iβm in a prime spot where I live that Iβm 20 minutes away from Lamborghini, Aston Martin, and other luxury car dealerships. So Iβd go there and purchase how many cars I can with the million. After I sign, sell them back to the dealership or sell them privately.
Do you really think they are not going to call the cops if a dude shows up with $1 million in cash to buy cars, asking to speed up the transaction? No way are they not gonna.
expired
almost 3 am in my room nothing is open so i guess uh air if its sent to my bank account id start ordering everything i could online
I just tried ntfy, it works ! How do I self host the server if you don't mind?
If you (or a banker or anyone you're paying) needed to count that money, you'd need to count just over 11 bills every 4 seconds, just to count all the bills within an hour, let alone have time to actually spend the money. This is assuming $100 bills, of which you'd need 10,000 of. This many bills also weighs 22 pounds or 10 kilograms, plus whatever the weight of the container you're carrying it is... IDK man I think I'd not even try to spend most of it, grab maybe $500-1000 in cash, and go on a quick shopping spree at Target or something, which is like a 10 minute walk from where I live. I could buy groceries, clothing, electronics, household items, etc. If I still had time I would go back and try to buy gift cards in large denominations, but I know cashiers are supposed to give people a hard time with that because of scammers, so I wouldn't want to deal with that during the initial transaction.
I'd buy ETH
slight problem with that. You get the money in cash. So you have to convert physical cash money into something not physical, in order to buy the also-not-physical currency.
It's 9:30pm in the middle of nowhere.
I'd put everything in my save for later in my Amazon cart and buy it. I'd buy a bunch of crafting supplies online, I'd buy the sports things for my husband online. Probably buy a new monitor or 3, new desk chair, and all the parts I can order online for the racecar. Probably spend my remaining time scrolling Etsy and Amazon for every impulse purchase I can think of, then I'd be out of time lol
But you can't do all that with cash π otherwise that would def be mine too