this post was submitted on 12 Aug 2023
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There are a lot of news articles about "back to the office", but they recirculate the same bad ideas. Let's provide some new ideas for the media to circulate. It may also have the effect of making the office less terrible.

I would like my work computer to do Windows updates lightning quick in the office. It currently takes weeks, in or out of the office. Stopping in for a day makes no difference, so there is no point. Now, if there was a point, I would go in.

What would get you in the office?

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[–] JeffCraig@citizensgaming.com 5 points 1 year ago

500k salary

[–] Behaviorbabe@kbin.social 5 points 1 year ago

Regularly? Nothing. I go there to access material most of the time.

[–] silvercove@lemdro.id 5 points 1 year ago

Absolutely nothing

[–] vettnerk@lemmy.ml 5 points 1 year ago

I sometimes have to. Not because someone tells me to, but because my physical presence is actually needed.

Sometimes I have to fly in from my middle-of-nowhere home office because whatever system I was troubleshooting wasn't fixable via VPN. And said system can be anywhere in the world, so it doesn't really matter where I live.

So returning to an office based work location? Yeah, that ain't happening..

[–] dingleberry@discuss.tchncs.de 5 points 1 year ago

Walking distance from the office. And doesn't mean I'll relocate to a 1 bedroom apartment just to be next to the office.

[–] Poob@lemmy.ca 5 points 1 year ago

They're going to have to buy me a car and pay for gas and parking before I'll take a job where I'm full time in the office

[–] Wirrvogel@feddit.de 5 points 1 year ago

An office I can walk to. I might even prefer that to a home office, because I find it hard to get away from work when it is always looking at me at home, even in my spare time.

An office where I have a say in how it is furnished and how it looks, together with my colleagues of course. Natural light, being able to sit or stand at my desk. "Please do not disturb" signs that people respect when I want to concentrate on my work. A place that is built to reduce noise, and that allows me to have it as cold or warm, light or dark, as I need it to be that day.

A place where I can eat and drink when I need to, and a place where I can lie down for a moment when it helps me recover from a difficult task.

Basically, make my workplace a place to live, because work is life, not a separate thing, and you go home to start living.

[–] belated_frog_pants 4 points 1 year ago

A 50% salary increase. I lose hours a week commuting, thats my life being taken away.

Not to mention getting sick because co-workers come in sick, the loudness of stupid open office spaces, douchebags who wont bathe before work...

The office sucks ass and my house is a much better environment for me working.

[–] BorgDrone@lemmy.one 4 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Fewer total days working for the same salary.

If they said: you can work 5 days/week from home or 3 days/week from the office, I'd pick the office.

[–] ApathyTree@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 1 year ago

Idk, given that scenario, I’d still wfh and just not do anything those extra 2 days, since clearly the work can be done in 3. Or work really slowly, and do lots of other things instead like play games make things, or clean.

[–] Marks@kbin.social 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Really, the only option. Either more pay or more free time. The amount of savings in not having to commute means going back to the office is a pay cut.

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[–] donuts@kbin.social 4 points 1 year ago

Employers generally pay employees to do things that they can't or don't want to do. We work (doing things we don't necessarily want to do) simply because it makes us money.

So yeah, want people to return to the office? That better come with a big offer attached or no dice.

[–] eleanor@social.hamington.net 4 points 1 year ago

Higher pay and a housing market carsh

[–] FART@lemm.ee 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

More money. I’d do anything for the right price.

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[–] DrBob@lemmy.ca 4 points 1 year ago

I never really left the office. I had a 6 week stint working from home and then we were recalled. I'm in public safety so we were directly involved in the pandemic response.

[–] colforge@lemm.ee 3 points 1 year ago

Triple my salary would be my minimum requirement to offset the additional freedom and lack of commute that I’d have to give up. I’d be spending less time with my family and I won’t give that up for anything less than triple my current pay.

[–] hsl@wayfarershaven.eu 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I've been remote for over seven years now. I can't think of anything that would get me back into the office - why would I, when working remotely works so much better for me?

If I were these employers, I'd want to step back and figure out why it's so important to have people back in the office. Assuming they can find good reasons, work from those. For example, if it's about some employees actually preferring to work from the office, what kind of hybrid solution can you set up to make them more successful? How can you connect those who are remote and those who are on location? And so on.

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[–] m4xie@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 1 year ago

A job. Please, lol!

[–] Semi-Hemi-Demigod@kbin.social 3 points 1 year ago

Because I work with customers and they’re naturally spread around geographically, there’s nothing that would do it. There’s just no reason.

Make it optional for starters, followed by compensation for gas for anyone coming in.

[–] SpaceCadet@sopuli.xyz 3 points 1 year ago

Teleportation technology

[–] acetuk@feddit.uk 3 points 1 year ago

I find this really interesting. I’m based in the UK and in what is classed as an essential job. So during all of the COVID isolation period I was still going to work, in the same office doing the same thing. I haven’t had a period working from home for a very long time and the idea, whilst appealing in some ways just doesn’t fit how I work today.

[–] dandroid@dandroid.app 3 points 1 year ago

Free food every day.

[–] Pacers31Colts18@lemm.ee 3 points 1 year ago

Desperation. I'd have to be fired from my job and begging for work.

[–] richieadler@lemmy.myserv.one 3 points 1 year ago

I'm only required to go 4 days a month (supposedly once a week).

I go almost every day anyway. 15 minutes of subway (Buenos Aires' Subte) and the office is more confortable than my very small department anyway. Also, nice lunch room, refrigerators with fruit, nice coffee and even when it's open floor, the number of people is still reduced and not (too) distracting.

[–] scytale@lemm.ee 3 points 1 year ago

Quadruple my pay and keep everything else (responsibilities, flex hours, unlimited PTO, etc.) the same.

[–] kratoz29@lemm.ee 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Back to the office? In my country almost nobody left the office, even when the pandemic was at its peak lol.

[–] someguy3@lemmy.ca 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] kratoz29@lemm.ee 2 points 1 year ago
[–] Carter@feddit.uk 2 points 1 year ago

I've never worked in an office but it sounds like hell.

[–] Samanthastanky@lemmy.ca 2 points 1 year ago
  1. 4 day work week
  2. 6 hour work day
  3. 120k min salary
  4. Lunch provided
  5. Home cleaning service provided though benefit plan
  6. I would need an office (no cube/open concept)
  7. Casual dress code
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