Jokes and Humor

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submitted 1 year ago by neamhsplach to c/humor

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[–] Exaggeration207 7 points 1 year ago

“If we hit that bullseye, the rest of the dominoes will fall like a house of cards. Checkmate.”

[–] branchial@feddit.de 6 points 1 year ago

"I have an idea!"

"I have a better one."

It's so casually mean 😅

[–] Faydaikin 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

"Oops.." [misses giant red button with finger]

[–] alpaca_math 4 points 1 year ago

“No fair, you changed to outcome by measuring it”

[–] thefingolfin 4 points 1 year ago

I trust the orgy pit has been scraped and buttered *giggles"

[–] kosama@socel.net 3 points 1 year ago

@neamhsplach My favorite one is the reply to saving those monks, "Fat chance! You can't count on God for jack. He pretty much told me so himself."

[–] EmrysOfTheValley 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'll make my own *insert item heref with blackjack and hookers Why not zoidberg And somehow Champagne has become unironc in my vocabulary now 😂

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[–] useful_idiot@lemmy.eatsleepcode.ca 2 points 1 year ago

No fair! You changed the outcome by measuring it!

[–] princecharmander 2 points 1 year ago

When can we have some Slurm?

SOON ENOUGH!

Aww, that's not soon enough.

[–] princecharmander 2 points 1 year ago

When can we have some Slurm?

SOON ENOUGH!

Aww, that's not soon enough.

[–] Ozymati@lemmy.nz 2 points 1 year ago

Good news everybody!