Relationship Anarchy

Right, which is why we need more diverse experiences and people on development and writing teams.

Yeah, I see it all the time where people, but especially online blame the wrong things i.e. polyamory or being gay is the problem instead of the actual problem like someone's shitty behaviour. You never hear that it's the monogamy that's the problem when monogamous people do it or it's the straightness when straight people do it.

I'm not sure I agree with you that having one gay character is objectively an over representation, because nothing is in isolation and thinking in terms of the entirety of society gayness is still vastly under-represented, so I think it could be seen as subjective over-representation but not at all objective.

I don't agree it's safer, time and time companies have been proven incorrect that making the same stuff leads to the same amount of engagement and money amongst those who interact with entertainment. Most people will be just fine with diversity in media and actually learn more about the world around them, so these companies think they are safer but it actually leads to a downturn many times or people eventually becoming bored and giving up.

I agree it's impossible to represent everything but I'm not asking for everything, just a few more games and media in genres that I enjoy to reflect me and reality since a lot of us are queer and also queering our relationships nowadays.

I guess I will continue to be disappointed and bothered.

Yeah, RPGs can be a bit lacking in choice a lot of the time, but they're okay for what they are, the last good one I played was one that focused entirely on a pre-existing relationship and whilst yes monogamous did have a lot of the communication, consent and boundary respecting, all of which are things I like in relationships: Haven.

As someone who is demisexual and has views on romance I quite agree. Also my partners are all some combination of ace and aro and afaik all R.A. which is why I'd like to see R.A. in games and other media as I think it fits that perfectly for aro and ace folks, including myself.

Yeah, it's a shame that the core of such relationships aren't necessarily care (unlike from my understanding QPRs) but how much they have sex or how much they love (read show conventional romance) each other and if either of those things stop then it's over, which I strongly dislike.

Well, the problem with polyamory in games, even if it's modded in, is it doesn't deal with the important aspects like consent, communication etc (not that mononormative games deal with those aspects particularly well either). There's often no real acknowledgment of it between the characters you date.

Having said that I heard that Pumpkin Days has polyamory built in and it's a farming sim, so maybe check that out?

Yeah, I was actually thinking about other media as I wrote this. I do wish there was more heartfelt relationship building where characters worked through their problems and came out better for it, all the while trying their best to focus on boundaries, consent and communication.

I also wish that we could have more representation of mistakes being okay in relationships with a focus on healing and resolving to not do it again and do better, that too would reflect my own life and what I'd hope to see in most relationships I have going forward with folks. Instead of it all being over if a mistake with no intent to harm was made.

Of course, harm and relationships is another interesting thing which could be looked at especially through a restorative and transformative justice lens, sadly though I think many aren't ready for that yet. However, I don't think it shouldn't be tried just because of most not being ready. After all, in order to try more useful things we need to have representation of it.