this post was submitted on 26 Dec 2022
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What is the optimal length that a couple should date before moving in? (lemmy.perthchat.org)
submitted 2 years ago by thursday_j@lemmy.perthchat.org to c/psychology@lemmy.ml
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cross-posted from: https://lemmy.perthchat.org/post/184069

All I found with citations was that it's best to wait until marriage before cohabitation, but that boomer talk ain't gonna happen for zoomers.

Otherwise, 1 article said "wait as long as possible" but I need a month/year number lmao.

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[–] thalamus_reborn@lemmy.ml 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

i would consider it a well-known fact that there is a link between cohabitation before marriage and higher rate of divorce.

granted, divorce rates are rising anyway. but to be totally honest, if OP considers this boomer talk, it just speaks to lack of insight and life experience (which you will get when you move in with someone, to be fair). also, looking for an exact number to reach some kind of threshold just seems like a cry for validation. you certainly don't need to gain approval from people on the internet to make a decision (myself included). you won't need to know a number when you're ready, because you'll know the time is right.

regardless of what i said, i hope you find further research on the matter (try using pubmed or national institute of mental health resources) and i hope you find happiness if you're taking that next step in life.

[–] CatsGoMOW 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It can hardly be called a “well-known fact.” There are many conflicting studies on this matter, even coming from the same research organizations. For example, this snippet from an article in The Atlantic:

In 2012, a study in the Journal of Marriage and Family concluded that “since the mid-1990s, whether men or women cohabited with their spouse prior to marriage is not related to marital stability.” This is the same journal that just published a study finding the opposite.

Here is that study.

[–] thalamus_reborn@lemmy.ml 1 points 1 year ago

perhaps i need to revisit the subject in detail, but a posted above a more recent study from 2019 which looks at the same subject.

like i said in a comment above, i'm happy to be proven wrong about this, i was just reporting what i knew about it from academic experience.