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Relaxed section for discussion and debate that doesn't fit anywhere else. Whether it's advice, how your week is going, a link that's at the back of your mind, or something like that, it can likely go here.

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Another reason to leave Reddit: I forgot how hostile it can be (self.chat)

submitted 1 year ago by xray to c/chat

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I've mostly left reddit and switched to beehaw, but I posted on somewhat of a niche tech-related subreddit today since there really isn't a community for that here yet. And wow, I got instantly downvoted twice and the first comment response was rude and hostile. All I posted was a feature suggestion for software that I thought would be useful and that a good amount of people would like based on other feedback I've heard. This is not the sort of topic that should be controversial or aggravating, and it wasn't like I made an ignorant post suggesting a feature that already existed or otherwise wasn't well researched.

This type of instantly hostile response has happened numerous times on reddit for various different topics, but I just haven't posted for a while, so I forgot just how shitty it can feel. It makes me really appreciate how friendly and respectful the community is here on Beehaw and on Mastodon. People seem to have good faith in one another similar to how the internet used to be in the old days.

Have you had similar experiences with Reddit and similarly opposite experiences here on Beehaw/Lemmy?

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[–] LemmyAtem 19 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Sometime in the past few years I feel like reddit devolved into an argument fest. It seems like the only thing anyone is interested in is arguing or saying rude or hateful shit in the comments. It turned me off to commenting tbh and even pre-api nonsense made me realize I didn't enjoy reddit the way I used to.

It's nice here still, and hopefully stays that way. Sometimes I'll write something that I realize could be taken as rude and I'll feel like an absolute asshole until I fix it. Like I'm worried I'll upset someone when I didn't mean to... I haven't given something like that a second thought on Reddit in years.

Also if anyone reads a comment from me and I sound like an asshole, please let me know! It's almost certainly not intended, especially anywhere on Beehaw.

[–] NekoRogue 8 points 1 year ago

Also if anyone reads a comment from me and I sound like an asshole, please let me know! It's almost certainly not intended, especially anywhere on Beehaw.

This kind of energy is why I like it here on Lemmy, and especially Beehaw. Being nice should be the default. On Reddit, I got downvoted so many times just for asking a question in good faith. Then if getting downvoted bothers you, you get mocked further. "It's just the internet, grow up" kind of stuff. Downvoting may not be a big deal to some people, but some don't understand that it can have an effect on your mental health to feel rejected so much. You don't know what other people are going through, having a heavily downvoted comment could even be a last straw for someone. Getting constantly insulted and downvoted can feel like the whole world is against you if you're in a bad place. And a lot of people are in a bad place, especially since 2020. A lot of people are lonely and only have the internet to talk to, and if the internet rejects you too? It hurts. It's not that hard to be nice, especially to people who mean well. I hope Lemmy stays like this as much as possible.

I would also like to be notified if I sound like an asshole about anything. It sounds dorky, but spreading even small moments of positivity really does have an effect on our world. We can see the damage that rage bait has done to people. Little things add up and they do have an effect on all of us. Let's try to spread kindness as much as possible.

[–] baggins 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I'm reminded of the Monty Python Argument sketch ;-)