Drag is trans, and uses person-independent neopronouns. These can be confusing for some people. But drag is patient, and with the vast majority of people is not pushy with drag's pronouns at all. In return, the vast majority of people tend to take no issue with drag. However, some people decide to invent a problem because they see drag using drag's pronouns, and it makes them angry.
Drag has a problem with one of these people, a pawb.social user called Draconic_NEO. Drag would normally just send a report, and drag is in the process of doing that, but the level of harassment has elevated to abuse of mod powers, and drag feels the need to inform the pawb.social admins of this user, as well as giving full context to the issue.
A week ago, drag created a thread on the db0 instance regarding a wrongful ban. Here is the context of drag's comments which lead to the ban:
Drag has used HTML to restore the deleted comments in the thread to save you time checking the modlog. As you can see, someone insults drag for drag's style of talking, and drag merely explains what is going on. Some people are unfamiliar with first person neopronouns, and drag patiently explains. The first removed comment is actually drag answering a direct question from another user. A moderator of the community decided that a trans person explaining their pronouns is rulebreaking behaviour, and drag posted about it on db0's "power tripping bastards" community. Drag didn't choose the name of that community, it's just the only place to complain about bad mod decisions.
Here is Draconic_NEO's take on the original ban:
Please understand that drag did not pivot the conversation to dragself, or display any aggression in the thread. Someone insulted drag for using neopronouns, and drag patiently explained. Draconic_NEO is, in this comment, inventing a narrative that a trans person's pronouns are an attack on others for the sake of attention-seeking. This is a transphobic cliche. The complaint that drag's use of neopronouns somehow makes drag similar to some troll is... nonsense? Drag doesn't get it, but it seems to be a core part of Draconic_NEO's argument that someone else was apparently a neopronoun user in the past, and now everyone else has a license to hate neopronoun users.
And here is Draconic_NEO in the same thread, attacking the entire concept of nounself pronouns. Here are some resources on nounself pronouns, which are an established part of queer culture and what drag's pronouns would probably fall under:
https://nonbinary.wiki/wiki/Nounself_pronouns
https://pronoun.fandom.com/wiki/Nounself_Pronouns
https://www.dictionary.com/browse/nounself-pronoun
https://edition.cnn.com/us/neopronouns-explained-xe-xyr-wellness-cec/index.html
For someone who uses the nounself pronoun “leaf,” that may look like: “I hope leaf knows how proud we are that leaf is getting to know leafself better!” or “Leaf arrived at the coffee shop before me; I was mortified to have been late to meet leaf.”
As you can see, nounself pronouns are prominent enough in the queer culture to be referenced on CNN and even dictionary.com. Attacks on the idea of nounself pronouns are, in a word, transphobic.
Drag will stop posting excerpts from the thread here, because the reason this post isn't just a report, is that drag can't report all of Draconic_NEO's harassment.
All four of these communities are moderated by Draconic_NEO, with nobody above them but the admins to tell: Drag has never posted or commented on or even seen these communities before. Drag didn't know they existed. Lemmy UI doesn't even have a button to do that. You have to manually make an HTTP request yourself in order to do it. This took effort, this took work. And the only possible reason to do it, is to create a record across all of Lemmy of a single user's grievances that anyone will see when they search that particular user.
And it's already happened. People look at modlogs, and they trust moderaters. The barrier to entry to becoming moderator of a dozen no-name communities is zero, but the authority of being able to create a permanent record on which to tell whatever lies you like and be believed by many people, is powerful. And drag can't report these modlog decisions to the admins. Drag can't reason with somebody who has a basic hostility towards trans people who use nounself pronouns, and who invents stories about imagined violence by trans people.
Transphobia is against the rules on pawb.social. Harassment is against the rules. Spreading misinformation is against the rules. Drag wants all of this to stop, please.
Drag doesn't care what complaints you have against drag. Drag is talking about your behaviour. Drag doesn't care that you want to change the subject to your grievances about drag. Drag gave you a chance to explain your actions and contextualise them, and you chose not to. You just chose more insults. You made one tangible point, and drag will address it:
Drag has not complained that you don't use drag's pronouns. Drag will not complain that you don't use drag's pronouns. If you want to refer to drag without pronouns, you are welcome to use drag's display name, Dragon Rider.
In addition, drag will clarify once again that the problem is not and has never been your use or disuse of any pronouns. The problem is your insistence that by having pronouns, drag is committing some kind of act of violence against you. Drag will post the screenshots of your comments again:
The first one is a lie that you are still telling when you pretend the use of drag's pronouns is the problem here. The second one is a complaint about thousands of trans people's identities.
You accused drag of sealioning when drag gave you a chance to explain dragself.
Fine. Drag will unambiguously avoid any sealioning and say: Go away. Do not defend your actions. Do not provide any evidence against what drag has shown here. Drag asked you if you wanted to, and you said no. Your answer is accepted. Please do not debate drag any further. Drag is already disappointed that you commented on this thread in the first place. You say you want to be left alone, and that you don't want any debate, and drag accepts this. Do not contact drag again.
If any admins are still reading after all this conversation: drag is happy to talk about the issue with you. But not with Draconic NEO. They have said all they wished to say.
I agree, we're done with this conversation, it was incredibly unprofessional for you to decide to create a public thread about this, possibly inuring further harassment against me as a result. Which is why such practice is discouraged but I think you knew that which is why you did it.
heyo, they also created a community aimed at harassing you: https://discuss.online/c/fuckdraconicneo
just so you know
What the heck.
@jgrim@discuss.online @lazyguru@discuss.online could you please have a look?
Yeah I know I saw. I've been getting pings on almost all my accounts. fucker is even pinging my Mastodon accounts.
man sorry that's happening to you :/ That reaction is so overblown and childish
I agree, it's insanely immature and and extremely overblown. This person also seems extremely unstable 😬
Still sorry for you.
On the other hand, once this is settled, we can call this the Dragon Battle 😅
That's next level
I think this has to be the worst person I've ever met on Lemmy. Maybe even the Fediverse as a whole. The only thing that beats them in all my experiences are the people who would call me an egg and misgender me in my discord DMs.
You have been asked not to contact drag again. You ignored drag. Please stop harassing drag.