this post was submitted on 21 Jun 2023
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Today I Learned
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Whoo, does this put me in a good mood.
My dad did his best considering he lost his dad at 14, so I don't blame him too much. But if there was something I knew I'd do one day as a dad (currently have a 4-year-old daughter) it'd be spending free time with her.
My generation isn't the best, but I knew this was a statistic we'd slam dunk.
High five!
I’m with you on this all the way. My dad did, and continues to do, his best. But as an elder millennial (I was born in 81, and as best I can tell that’s what I am, I guess), as I got older it felt like our generation was collectively fucked up about a lot of the same stuff - whatever the reason. And we were making many of the same promises to ourselves.
My dad loves my two kids more than anything in this world, but there’s a definite feel of redemption-seeking there. Or maybe just trying to soothe regrets.
I have a preteen and a toddler, and for different reasons I held both of them close yesterday. I begged my brain to remember these moments when I’m my dad’s age, because I’ve been able to be there for almost every leg of the journey so far. I really don’t want it to start to all just blend together, because right now it feels so special and unique to have this opportunity.
Another 40+ with a toddler here. I swear it was just the other day I was holding up a bottle for her, now she's talking in full-freakin sentences. The other day was a very eventful one: tumbling class, day at the park, went for a swim at the pool. Shortly after dinner, the wife and I were just chatting a little about our day and she comes up, looks right up at us and exclaims "I NEED TO GO TO BED" :)
I am looking forward to the day we can go on a bicycle backpacking trip together, but for now she rides in tow on mine, and I know, one day, I'm really going to miss that too.
The bicycle backpack thing could happen quicker than you think. In 1985, when he was 8, I took my son on a 200 km golf trip by bicycle. Every day ended with 9 holes of golf played with a shared set of 4 clubs (something you can get away with on pasture courses where fees are on the honour system). One day with favourable winds we did 100km and 18 holes. We slept good that night!
He still talks about it!
High five back!
I'm 86, but I feel you. Before he passed, my dad played with his granddaughter in a similar fashion. My theory was, he saw how involved I (and my peers) was and realized it wasn't too late.
I think it'll help me out that my hobbies are likely to be the hobbies my kid has. When they see me playing Minecraft or something and they ask to play, I'll be able to just slide them a controller or hand them my phone to play on or something and we can build a house together.