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Could you help me with a bit of life advice? Ending uni, scared of going forward. (sh.itjust.works)

submitted 1 year ago by aeon_flux@sh.itjust.works to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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Hi,

I'm at that point in life where I'm facing big changes/having to take decisions for the first time and I'm scared.

I'll soon be starting an internship abroad with a good company and, silly to say, I'm getting cold feet. I'm scared of the move and about the future - at the possibility that I'll like it and want to go there, and leave the people here behind.

I'm also scared that my partner wouldn't want to come with me if that were the case. They say they aren't sure yet. I understand, but it still makes me feel anxious for the future. I would hate to be in the situation where I would have to choose between a good job and losing my partner. It's so silly writing this down.

I think I'm just rambling and could use someone older to give me some advice about the way their life went. I dont really have older role models around, I'm on my own with this one. I guess that's part of the problem. I'm full of internal conflict, on so many topics at once - from practical life direction to things like philosophical/ideological matters.

Thanks for reading this. Hope life is kind to you.

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[–] GrouchyLady@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

Something I took a long time to learn is "Don't borrow trouble." You'll run into plenty of problems throughout your life, so there's no need to expend energy on those that haven't happened yet. Yeah, I know that's easier said than done. :)

Remember that you are smart and capable. You can handle whatever life throws your way, and life has a funny habit of surprising us. What you're worried about often doesn't happen, but other surprises do come along, both good and bad. You can do your best to prepare, but the reality is that you'll face things you don't feel prepared for, and you'll be OK.

You may love the job, or you may hate it, but you will probably hate the fact that you gave up the opportunity if you don't go. Being apart may make you a stronger couple, or it may make one or both of you realize you want to move on. That could happen regardless of where you are, even if you stay physically together. You have a wonderful opportunity, and I encourage you to take it.