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More Realistic Meat Substitute Made From Soy Raised In Brutally Cruel Conditions (www.theonion.com)

submitted 10 months ago by usernamesAreTricky@lemmy.ml to c/theonion@midwest.social

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[–] seathru@lemm.ee 48 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Works for hot peppers. The worse you treat them while growing; the hotter, angrier and tastier they get.

[–] Zoboomafoo@slrpnk.net 27 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (2 children)

Certain vegetables like leeks get buried as they sprout to make the "shoot" part as long as possible.

Rhubarb is grown in near complete darkness, and it screams as it grows towards a light it'll never reach

[–] seathru@lemm.ee 20 points 10 months ago

Rhubarb is grown in near complete darkness, and it screams as it grows towards a light it’ll never reach

Rhubarb cellars are metal. I forgot all about that.

[–] CarbonIceDragon@pawb.social 3 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Where does the rhubarb get energy then? Does it just rely on stored energy in the seed or roots or something and get given light eventually, or can it actually use tiny amounts of light?

[–] Zoboomafoo@slrpnk.net 10 points 10 months ago

The plant has an energy reserve underground that is allowed to build up for a year or two before starting to harvest.

If you are doing it sustainably, you can harvest the shoots until they start showing signs of undernourishment, then you stop harvesting and let it build energy back up.

Forcing the rhubarb is an option for the shoots you plan on eating, they grow faster and sweeter than if they grow naturally