Schedar

joined 1 year ago
[–] Schedar 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

The biggest barrier I’ve seen around me from other Dads is mostly about positive father figures and the expectations of society of what it is to be a good Dad and supporting partner (this is also mentioned in the article which I agree with).

I was absolutely shocked at the bare minimum that other Dads seem to do and get away with. People who I’d normally consider good,thoughtful and responsible people just seem absolutely oblivious to the struggles of their partner and what it takes to be a properly equal parent.

Discussing it (gently… as it’s never my place to butt into other people’s parenting styles) the running theme was that they are using their own Dad as a sort of base line, trying to be genuinely better than what came before, that’s admirable …. But this base is often so low in terms of being “hands on” that changing the odd nappy and spending some time playing every now and again is seen as a big step up.

There is also this feeling that somehow paid work is more important or harder than parenting work. Which is absolute nonsense for most jobs. “It’s my day off!” “I’ve finished work I want to relax” - Sorry but no, when you get home it’s now time to 50/50 parent at the very least. (Edit: somehow this view doesn’t reflect when Mum is also a working…. Dad needs a break as he’s finished work.. but Mum doesn’t get a break when finishing work and has to go straight into parenting)

Of course there are exceptions as long as both parents have really good communication and discuss what works for them and are both genuinely happy with the arrangement.

This doesn’t reflect every situation and every Dad.. I have Dad friends who are great and absolutely true 50/50 parents.. but most that I know do sadly fall into what I’ve described.

Society in general needs to be promoting positive role models for what fatherhood should be and stop with the bumbling idiot dad who’s only role is to “bring home the bacon” which is so outdated and generally harmful. We need that base line of being a good Dad to be higher… Basically we need more Bandits.

I would argue though that if “Dads want to do more caretaking” they absolutely can. The barriers for Dads are much, much lower than the other side of the coin “Mums want to have a career”.

[–] Schedar 1 points 1 year ago

Just finished S2 and really enjoyed it. A bit sad that I wasn’t able to resist and watched it all in just a few days.

Maybe I’ll go back and rewatch the first series

[–] Schedar 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I agree, that is the major reason I try to choose plant based options. I was just thrown by @Hirom saying about chicken being better for the environment, I'm assume they meant it's better than beef (which it is) but not as good as the plant-based versions.

[–] Schedar 8 points 1 year ago (3 children)

with chicken meat since it has a smaller impact on the environment.

I had assumed that a plant-based burger would be better for the environment than a meat based burger (including chicken) - or am I entirely wrong here? (I guess there is complexity depending on the type of "plant-based" burger and the type of meat and where it was sourced from etc)

[–] Schedar 35 points 1 year ago (7 children)

I do eat meat (I do acknowledge that this is an ethical and moral failing) but with the plant-based alternatives being so good I have changed my eating habits a lot.

Plant Based is now what I tend to buy as my first choice in the vast majority of cases and I don't feel that I've lost anything in doing so. This is far from a properly consistent moral choice but it has helped me dramatically lower how much animal products I buy.

[–] Schedar 1 points 1 year ago

Lot's of recommendations here thank you everyone. Will take me a little bit of time to read through all the options here but there looks to be same great solutions.

Thank you very much.

[–] Schedar 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Just to answer your question:

It's quite a lot of data but not insanely important, it would be really inconvenient if I lost it but far from the end of the world. I'm looking at local backup because in the event of an entire hardware drive failure having to download all the data again over the internet would take an absolute age. Not that a cloud backup isn't also good (I am using backblaze) in case the local backup drive also failed at the same time.

I do however have other things that are really important which I already backup with multiple levels of cloud and local storage (such as family photos, secure documents etc) - I will check out tarsnap as well though as it sounds interesting Thank you

[–] Schedar 2 points 1 year ago

For these particular files I do also use Backblaze, that's definitely useful if a subset of files were lost but having to download an entire 8TB hdd worth of data would be pretty painful with Backblaze (their physical hdd shipping isn't really a good option as I'm not US based).

In this case as the external drives were on offer I bought two of them with the intention of the second drive to be the backup. The files here aren't really really important, but would be very annoying if I lost it all.

For my truly critical files (things like family photos, secure documents etc) I have other multiple levels of backup, both with synced cloud services and local backups just to be safe. Backups upon Backups upon Backups there! (3 - 2 - 1 and then some)

[–] Schedar 1 points 1 year ago

Has there been hints of any new Becky Chambers book that you’ve heard of? The news section of otherscribbles.com doesn’t have anything since nearly a year ago.

When I was deep in the sleep deprived zone of new parenthood, listening & readying to Beckychambers books on audio book was just perfect. I was too fragile to deal with any horribly dark or dense sci-fi books (that so many seem to be) and her books always felt like a nice cup of tea (pretty appropriate considering psalm for the wild-built!)

We are expecting our second and I’d love to have a new Becky chambers book to read or listen to when we restart the new born saga!

[–] Schedar 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I’m so glad to hear this. I haven’t started watching series 2 yet but am really looking forward to it.

[–] Schedar 1 points 1 year ago

Great! Thank you

[–] Schedar 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Sorry being so late in replying…

I’d have to give it more thought or mock something up…. Use case wise when giving things like paracetamol need to know quickly (through tired parent eyes)

How long ago was the last dose? How many doses have we already given in last 24h?

Perhaps a filtered timeline view which shows the recent logged medicines where you could show “all” medicines or filter it just to particular ones that you’ve logged e.g.

Paracetamol - 5h ago

Paracetamol - 11h ago

Paracetamol - 17h ago

Paracetamol - 23h ago

Paracetamol - 1d 5h ago

This I can see that I need to wait an hour before giving the next dose (one every 4-6 hours but max of 4 doses per 24h)

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