You know, the fucked up thing about it all is I was always told that the kind of delayed gratification that came from major accomplishments like a college degree, a steady career, a comfortable savings account, would all outweigh the fleeting pleasure of parties and stupid little trinkets and other such fun. I wish I had taken so much more time for myself because I burned out so hard achieving some of these things and failing to achieve others that I struggle deeply to imagine a future with me in it.
I hope whatever youth is left in the world spends their time having fun. I hope their lives are worth living now, and that mine will be someday too.
To be fair, that is exactly what I do some days after work because this shit is needlessly exhausting. I think I need like a year of sickly Victorian style bedrest because I have been so burned out for so long that I don't really have much of a sense of self at this point.