Congrats!
Transfem
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Some helpful links:
- The Gender Dysphoria Bible // In depth explanation of the different types of gender dysphoria.
- Trans Voice Help // A community here on blahaj.zone for voice training.
- LGBTQ+ Healthcare Directory // A directory of LGBTQ+ accepting Healthcare providers.
- Trans Resistance Network // A US-based mutual aid organization to help trans people facing state violence and legal discrimination.
- TLDEF's Trans Health Project // Advice about insurance claims for gender affirming healthcare and procedures.
- TransLifeLine's ID change Library // A comprehensive guide to changing your name on any US legal document.
- Gender Spectrum // Resources for youth, parents and family, educators, mental health professionals and faith leaders.
Support Hotlines:
- The Trevor Project // Web chat, phone call, and text message LGBTQ+ support hotline.
- TransLifeLine // A US/Canada LGBTQ+ phone support hotline service. The US line has Spanish support.
- LGBT Youthline.ca // A Canadian LGBT hotline support service with phone call and web chat support. (4pm - 9:30pm EST)
- 988lifeline // A US only Crisis hotline with phone call, text and web chat support. Dedicated staff for LGBTQIA+ youth 24/7 on phone service, 3pm to 2am EST for text and web chat.
Congratulations!! 😊 I'm just coming up on 7 months. Great that you were able to sort things out with a physical therapist. I still have some minor pain dilating due to some hypergranulation tissue I developed, but its gotten better over time.
How are you feeling about it at this stage? Your results are gonna become much clearer as the swelling goes down, but are you happy with how things have been going? :) wishing you a swift and easy recovery!!
It has been going great. I'm really grateful the physical therapist was able to do the first dilating session and guide me on what to do and what I should be feeling. Surgery was on the 20th and it looks great. I don't have a partner at the moment but looking forward to being cleared for that but also bath's.
I talked with them about how it doesn't feel new, like a new TV or car. Like it was always there but stuff was in the way. Dilating 3 times a day does let me know it's new though lol.
Biggest issue is having joint custody of my 4 year old and I can't pick her up. Having to rely on my sister a lot more for a bit but it's nice having her around.
Swelling is down a good amount and I have taken progress pics, deciding where to upload them. My insurance's gender care team called to see how I'm doing which I didn't even know they had. Talked about the surgery and Dr, they know the ones in the Boston area and wanted to see how good the Dr in Chicago was.
Wow which insurance carrier is that? That sounds like something all of them should do to better care for trans people
Care first. I'm glad they did as I had a vasovagal reaction the first time and needed help to overcome that.
I completely get how you feel about it not being new. To me at first it was new, but at this point I can hardly remember being pre-op. It's the most amazing feeling in the world not being repulsed by my anatomy, it's affected my confidence and my self esteem in such an unbelievable way. It feels like I've always been this way but at the same time like I'm not quite the same person as before.
Make sure to have lots of support around the house and take as much time to rest as possible. I am blessed to have had my partner around, they did almost everything for me for the first 2 months.
So happy that things are going great for you. :) the first couple months can be tough mentally and physically, I hope that your recovery continues progressing well and before you know it months will go by and you'll be up and about again.
Thank you so much. My sister is living with me and helping where she can. I have to keep reminding myself to not pickup things though. Mentally I'm doing good, sometimes thinking of the past and how I got here is bittersweet. my ex-wife and I talked a bit about our daughter and life while I was stuck in the hospital. We have a better friendly co parent relationship now and she was worried about recovery and the surgery in general.
Congratulations! Is dilation something you have to do forever or only for a while?
Not speaking from experience, just what I’ve read.
You don’t have to dilate for forever per se. As time goes on you have to do dilation like activities less and less often to maintain it. I’m not sure if there’s a lower limit to how often, but I think there is. Also note I said “dilation like activities”. So after a while, it doesn’t strictly have to be dilation.
If I’ve said anything wrong, please let me know. Again, this is just what I remember from reading and isn’t something I’ve experienced myself.
Yeah, right now it's 3 times a day, goes down to 2 then 1 and then 1-2 times a week depending on if you have penetrative sex regularly.
My understanding is that you have to keep up something or lose depth, but that the time between gets so it can be a weekly event or so, rather than daily, but that that also depends on method. Dr Jun, and I'm not sure who else, do a hybrid flap peritoneal surgery where the peritoneal tissue stays connected inside and very rarely loses depth.
Depends on your surgical program how often you have to, but yes if you want to maintain a certain depth. Over time the vaginal cavity closes due to pressure from your other organs. Penetrative sex is a reasonable substitute for dilation, and having it regularly performs the same function as dilating.
Yeah, I have a question: what insurance plan are you on that actually covers that? Because I need to get on that!
Carefirst under blue cross Blue shield
Thanks!
Woo you go girl! 🙌
How long were you on hrt before deciding on getting GRS? Did you have to have electrolysis hair removal beforehand? (The latter has me paused rn)
I was on hrt since Aug of 2021, I had laser hair removal at a place that does it with liquid nitrogen spray so it doesn't hurt much.
Oh I just started with a place that does that too and it's so much better than regular laser hair removal
Which surgeon? Is that Schechter?
Yep!
How was your experience with him? I met him for a consultation years ago when I thought insurance would cover it, but he kinda gave me a weird vibe. I had heard his work was good so I still would've went with him if I could have, but it just wasn't in the cards at the time unfortunately
He is great, some bad reviews about his support team years ago but the new team is great as well. He is a nerd, less people skills, I would compare him to a backend coder in my career. Knows his shit, is nice but short conversation unless you ask him questions. I asked so many, even one he hadn't gotten before like has anyone had phantom testicle pain.
Ah okay, I think I just didn't quite get the whole picture during the consult. The main weird thing was just that after asking me to change into a gown they left the room for like 20min with no explanation, but he probably just had other stuff on his plate that day. This was also like 5 years ago so it could've been bc of his team at the time.
6 or 7 string?
If your guitar doesn't have a bass guitars strings above it's normal ones is it even worth having?
Yay. Keep us updated.